Jul 23, 2009

GTA + Doom = Love

Both me and my brother love the game Doom. Hell, we were rocking Wolfenstein before there even was a Doom. We also loved Grand Theft Auto. Again, before the fancy GTA that most games know and love, we were rockin it old skool. Of course we're both lovers of the new style too. So I had this great idea. Put the two best games out there together. A dollar to the developer who gets it done, and done right.

Here's the email exchange, hashing out all of the critical details.

Me: Know what would be fun? Doom in the GTA environment or GTA in the Doom World.

Brother Dan: Doom in the GTA environment would be best. of regular gta but with doom enemies. cruising down streets in a fast car dodging pinkies that have the mass of cars themselves, flying the choppers while cacodemons hurl fireballs at you from around skyscrapers and lost souls constantly buzz you. I think it would be freaky cool to be speeding in a car, hit look back and see flaming skulls screaming and chasing you.

Me: Damn, you make it sound really fun. When I wrote that I was half falling asleep and really didn't think it through. Picture me and you, both flying around in Annihilators battling a Cyberdemon. Or better yet, Doom in the GTA: San Andreas so we have the fighter gets. Just streaking in formation laughing missiles are them. NRG-900 and using the 2x barrel shotgun from TLAD taking down Imps in Star Junction. I'm quitting my job, you're stopping school. We're going to make this.

Brother Dan: From the makers of Transcontinental RV Derby Across America comes the latest in genre-splicing entertainment: Grand Theft DOOM-O

Me: Love it. I need more magnet balls. I'm going to form a DOOM-O figure for our big release.

Brother Dan: I think the box art should be a side view of you in your slightly beat up muscle car cruising down the evening downtown street, flaming wrecks and bodies motion blurred in the background, and you're leaning out your busted window pointing your uzi behind you at the lost soul screaming and chasing you, flame from its head trailing long behind it. and the missions in the game could be survivalist groups and military outposts recruiting you to clean up areas, retrieve "prisoners" or technology from the enemies, find a new place to make camp or reconnect with another outpost, stuff like that

Me: Wow, if I had better photoshop skills I would so make that happen. And if I had any game making skills, I would so make that happen. And if I had better writing skills I would so make it happen that I would use the same phrase three times in my email.

The monsters would need the ability to damage objects. Cars of course, but also buildings and such. And be a bit smarter than they were in Doom.

Brother Dan: I think the enemies would deff be able to damage cars. the ones that don't shoot things would hit it like physical, like running into another car, or like when you hit a car with a bat. and fireballs would hit like small explosions, or set the car on fire. and of course cyberdemons launching actual rockets at you. arch viles scorching the street when they do that lightning thing. everything would be on fire if you stay in one place long enough. like a slow but persistant cop chase all the time.

Me: I'm totally playing it my head right now. And those stupid zombie humans walking around with their shot guns...or the chain gun fucker just jumping around a corner with the gun instantly trained on you. But no problem, you have an AK that can care of him. I think we still need the foul mouthed peds for easy killings and random chatter.

Brother Dan: yeah, those shotgun zombies, you're speeding away and then bam bam you got blasted with a couple shots near point blank as you fly by them and now your car is smoking, damnit

Jul 22, 2009

The 70's Tweet

This has been bothering me. Don’t know why, don’t care.

I was watch That 70’s Show a few days ago and Kelso mentions that he once tied a hamster to a balloon with a note on it. “It made it all the way to Minnesota” he says. That is my issue. The shows takes place in Wisconsin; and in my 30 years of living in Minnesota I’ve never heard of a weather event coming in from Wisconsin. It’s always a cold front coming down from Canada, or a blizzard from the Dakotas. Meaning; the weather around here, and most places I assume, works its self west to east. So I don’t see how this ballooned hamster made it to Minnesota.

Isn’t that just the dumbest things to bitch about? Well I don’t care. Suck it.



This post also starts what I hope to be a lame way to have some fun with Twitter. Every time I post here, I send an update via Twitter just so my followers know there is another pot of gold waiting to be read. But now I’m going to start @ing it to a random celeb to see if it gets picked up at all. I got this idea back when all the Michael Jackson stuff was going on. Ryan Seacrest posted a link, but he didn’t use a URL shortening service so it was too long for the tweet. I found what he was trying to link to and tinyurl’d it and RT’d it to him. He then reposted the link, but never gave me the credit or mention for doing so. Bastard. It’s cool, I still love the guy. I just wish I would have used bit.ly so I could see the stats for it.

Today it’s going out to @aplusk because of the Kelso thing.



Ryan makes long post with long link




I correct it




He reposts with MY short link






I’m also just going to email this to Blogger, I still hate their WYSIWYG editor. Hope it looks right when it gets there.

Jul 8, 2009

Damn you Google!

Google Chrome OS comming soon

I say damn you with much love for Google. I mean, I use Google for everything at home (my employer has yet to see the light). Gmail, Reader, Maps, Earth, search...I even write most of my blog posts with GoogleDocs (as I am right now). Oh, and my blog is hosted on Blogger; a Google owned site. I even dropped FireFox for Chrome. That was hard, but I'm a full Chrome believer now. I know there are some more Google apps I use, but just can't think of them.

Anyways...Google announced last night that there is a new project in the words. Google Chrome OS. It's first going to be for net-books. But as far as I can tell, they will be going after full desk-top systems too. That means my little ol laptop would be included. And get this ...

    "The software architecture is simple — Google Chrome running within a new windowing system on top of a Linux kernel." - Google Blog

That's awesome. Google + Linux = I want it. But this is the suck ass part. I just pre-ordered my copy of Windows 7. I guess the only thing keeping me calm about this is that I know it'll be a while before the Google Chrome OS will be available for a system such as mine. It's nothing fancy, but it's not a net-book.

Jul 6, 2009

4th of July - The most original title.

I never know how to start these things. It was a dark and stormy night... This post is really about me wanting to play with Google Maps and see if I get myself to embed the map without much hassle.


View July 4th in a larger map

The start of my day wasn't much to crow about. Oh, speaking of crowing, my wife selected her next two tattoos. Both including crows. Anyway. I got us Subway, putted around at home for while and continued to refine my ID3 tags in iTunes. With 12,038 files, and adding more almost weekly, it's a never ending task.


Later on H started to text back and forth with her brother to arrange what they called: Operation Brother Drop. He can't drive yet, so their father had to drop him from their middle of nowhere camp site. The park your trailer/camper and leave it year round kind, not tent. So it was set. Grab the brother and give him a good fourth of July. He was having no fun with the camping. I've been up there before, bore fest I tell ya.


On the way home H had the great idea to hit Culvers. We go there so little and it's a shame. We love the place, and we live really close, and we drive by it at least once a week. We eat there and I completely stuff myself. I'm even told by H and a complete stranger to have the root beer. Weird. We head home where we wait for the sky to darken. Our cue to head out to see the fireworks.


Now the fun begins. We make our way to Target to use their parking lot. I know that you can't park there unless you're shopping. But what are they going to do with every car in the area parking in their lot. Nothing, that's a what. We make our way to the soccer fields that Blaine uses for the big ass soccer tournaments every year. Right as we get situated, H start to not feel good. 30 minutes until the show starts. I race my way back to Target to get a bottle of water so she can take her medicine.


From our location I could see two other firework shows. The real fireworks (the show I went there for) was pretty cool. Sort of lackluster finale though. Overheard some fella say it's because of the recession. Not sure if I buy that, but I don't have a better answer.


Now here comes the grand exit. A couple thousand cars all trying to use the same three two-lane streets to get to the highway. And it's barely a highway. 4 lanes, but stoplights every 1/4 mile. Local Minnesotans of the north metro know my pain of highway 65. It took us about 35 minutes to travel 1.3 miles. Not cool. For most of the trip I had my eyes glued to the gas gauge. It was on E when I got to the lot to begin the night. And I knew all this time idling in traffic would be an adventure in its self. I should have turned towards the highway the first chance I had, but no. It was just a tiny bit backed up so I decided to keep going straight; thinking it would get better the further away from the event I was. Booooo me. That would have saved me big time I think. I heard plenty of booming cars with rap, 80's and country music. Somebody trying to direct traffic from their own idling car. Another person throwing out those tiny snap firecrackers out of their car window. We got hit with a sprinkler thru our open windows. We first thought it was some ass hitting us with a super soaker or something. I round the corner and can finally see the intersection. Yes! We’re going to make it. Just as we cross the low fuel light turns on. Even though we were 10 feet from the gas station, that light still panicked me for a second.


We make it home fine and vow that we are not doing this again next year. I suggest we just take bikes. Or we could just walk. It’s not that far away. I’m quickly shot down. So, I had a good fourth. I’ve missed out on the last few for just this reason. The hassle of coming and going to such an event.


Holy crap. Would you look at that? I didn’t expect to be so long winded. But it is what it is right? If you don’t like it, copy and paste it into notepad and edit away. Delete all together if you want. Whatever. And after proofing it, I realize it's a shit written tale too.